On Sunday, March 19, 1989, The Record — Bergen County, New Jersey’s daily newspaper — published the feature “When a Young Sibling Dies” on the front page of its Home section.  The story included a large color photo of me holding childhood snapshots, details of the anger and pain I’d suffered after her death, and resources for bereaved siblings locally and nationally.  It was the first time I’d “gone public” about my loss and its ramifications.

For twenty years after Ruth had died, I’d kept my feelings buried inside.  Seeing the movie, Ordinary People, unearthed these feelings and made me realize I needed professional help if I wanted to lead a full, productive life.  I began group therapy, did research on the effects of childhood illness and death on surviving siblings, and attended a national sibling loss workshop in St. Louis, Missouri, and a therapeutic sibling loss weekend in Chicago.  All these activities helped in my recovery,  but the Chicago workshop at The Rothman-Cole Center for Sibling Loss (now The Center for Grief Recovery and Therapeutic Services) was especially effective.
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